Have you ever scrolled your social media newsfeed and came upon a picture of a couple kissing, with the caption somewhere along the lines of, “I’m so in love with you pookie bear cuddlekins, happy one month!” or something just as revolting?

Yeah, I have too.

And you know what? We’re not the only ones.

Being the technology-driven generation that we are, it has now become necessary to address the affiliation between relationships and social media such as Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest.

One of the most age-old aspects of a relationship in the social media world is being Facebook official — that is, being in a relationship on your profile.

For me, this has always caused a bit of anxiety that I can only assume is a result of my presumed fear of the point where you have to publicly become “no longer in a relationship.” This is where friends, family members and even distant acquaintances can take a look at your failed relationship and send you, “Sorry ;(“ comments all day long.

For others, it is a public sign of commitment to everyone who can type your name into the search bar. It’s a way to ward off exes or those who may have been interested.

In terms of posting on these social media sites, some people definitely go overboard. It’s great to show appreciation for your significant other, but I think it’s a unanimous vote that for the most part, no one wants to see it.

You can always tell I’m in a relationship because there will be someone I try my best to make fun of on their Facebook walls via witty statements, pictures or inside jokes about my “I told you so” moments with them. Yes, I’m stuck in the 4th grade.

Sometimes social media can become a form of peer pressure on the Internet. A female friend of mine began pinning specific pictures on her Pinterest. First came flowers, then chapels, then the big white dress of her dreams. Because the Pinterest was connected to her Facebook, her significant other, David, been noticing these signs. Soon enough, Facebook users are commenting on her posts saying, “David, the pressure’s on!”

Without technology, this would never have been an issue. Since when did peer pressure become virtual?

Overall, I’d have to say it’s best to keep relationships off the Internet. With the cons outweighing the pros, at least in my book, please do the World Wide Web a favor at keep your mushy-gushyness to yourself.

Whether they’re buying you chocolates, arranging double-dates with your friends or paying for dates, there are always some things you wish your boyfriend or girlfriend wouldn’t do and others you wish they did more.

What things do you want your sweetheart to do, and what things would you rather they just didn’t do?

Kellie

One thing that I have always loved is when my boyfriend takes care of me when I’m sick.

I’m always on the go, running across campus trying to get my stories done and sometimes it catches up with me.

When I give him the congested “Babe, I’m sick. Do you have any chicken noodle soup?” phone call, I love when my boyfriend is right there with a myriad of over-the-counters from his medicine cabinet.

Simply put — it’s nice to feel comforted.

But what I don’t like is when he feels like giving his fashion expertise.

For the most part, boys take showers, run a quick hand through their hair, throw on some jeans and a T-shirt and they’re done.

So, what makes them fashion experts? Many girls want their guys to tell them, “Oh, that doesn’t look flattering on you,” or “you might not be able to pull off short hair.”

Excuse me?

If a guy has no idea how to tie a ponytail, has never had to deal with a bikini-line wax and thinks Audrey Hepburn was that chick who slept with JFK, then I don’t want to hear it.

You tell me if I look beautiful, or if I look beautiful. (I know what I said.) If I want a critical opinion about how I look, I’ll ask my mother.

What I do love is when my boyfriend carries things for me. I am a little—and I mean little—girl. I definitely consider myself all about power to the women, but I will never complain if he holds my door open, if he takes the heavy backpack off my shoulders and slings it over his or does anything to make my walk a little easier.

The best part is when he knows he doesn’t have to, but he does all those small, sweet things anyway. It’s considerate, thoughtful and charming.

But another thing I’m not a fan of is being overly lazy. Like I said before, I’m always on the go, but sometimes I still want that wonderful night out.

I’m an easy-going girl – I’d rather be at Leo’s Coney Island than a P.F. Changs, so I’m not asking for much.

All I’m asking is that he doesn’t let the massive piles of homework, exams and papers take over our lives. I still want a reason to put on some nicer clothes and think about something other than the looming responsibilities of getting a college education.

Something I do love is playing middle school.

And by that I mean doing all the things you did when you were littler – passing notes, making CDs for each other and sending goofy pictures of your friends to each other.

I used to have a boyfriend that would leave me notes in the strangest places that I would find at the strangest times.

There is nothing that brightens my day more than opening my planner to find “10:20 – Make time for your boyfriend” scribbled in the corner of the page

Keenan

Things I like a woman to do for me

A man takes on a big responsibility when dating a lady, especially when you’re on your first few dates.

For those dates it’s usually the dude picking something out, some big event or something to wow his woman. I put a ton of thought into every evening I spend with a woman and when they can do the same it’s amazing.

Some of the best nights I’ve ever had with a woman were having them take me to a concert of a band I love or planning an evening to a great restaurant and a movie she doesn’t even really want to see.

After a few months, I’m probably sick of paying for everything, or at least my wallet might be. That might offend a few people, but I’m not made of money.

I would kill to be able to front everything for my lady, but as a college student I don’t have that kind of dough. That’s why I love when a lady will step in front of me at the counter and slide her money to the cashier.

I think it’s a wonderful gesture and it’s incredibly thoughtful. When it happens you realize your lady knows your right down to your wallet, and thats pretty awesome.

I feel like on every cliché list of what dudes should do for ladies it usually says, “call her, just because.” I’ve done it before, just to talk and catch up when we’ve done nothing but text for the day.

Honestly, I love when a girl will call me just to talk to me and ask me about my day. Going out of her way is key to me and that’s what all three of these have to do with.

I do a lot to care and take care of a lady, and I love when it’s given back to me especially in the form of an out-of-the-blue phone call.

Things I hate a woman to do for me

It has never happened in all honesty, but if it ever did, I wouldn’t have it. I don’t know why but for some reason I view that as a man’s responsibility.

Of course sometimes I might want to put my head on a shoulder or lean into you, the last thing I ever want to do is have you slide behind me and hold me. It makes me feel inadequate, plus that’s my job.

This one is probably more about my ego. As a man I feel like I should always provide for my lady, and honestly I still believe in romance. I think flowers are a really dope gift to a lady because they last for a few days, then you can get her new ones. You arrange them just for her, pick out her favorite flowers and its absolutely classic.

Has a girl ever gotten flowers and said to herself “gross, get these away from me!” No. That being said it’s a strict man to woman gift. The one time I got flowers, I felt like I was taking a back seat. I loved her meaning behind it, but I’d never felt smaller. Generally, I think its a man thing to do.

Being a straight up gentleman is heavily underrated. I think that paying for a lady the first few months you take her out is a gentleman’s thing to do.

Later on in a relationship I love when I girl can chip in and provide, however for the first few dates put your wallet away. I don’t know anyone who wouldn’t appreciate the gesture, but I truly don’t when we’re first getting things started.

When you’re out having a wonderful time on a date with someone, they’re saying all the right things and you think it really could go far, was there ever something you suddenly noticed that instantly canceled it all out?

Kellie
With the loss of Josh as my co-pilot for the blog, I had to recruit a new man to add to my pizzazz on the blog — Keenan Cronyn.

He’s a designer here at The State News who knows his way around the dating field and has a new perspective to share with our readers.

So, without further ado, welcome to the new Keenan and Kel.

This week’s topic: deal breakers.

Deal breakers are little things — often physical, sometimes personality traits — that you realize you just cannot deal with.
My new pal Keenan and I laid out our top three deal breakers, what are yours?

1. Oral Hygiene
As someone who has spent many years with a mouth full of metal, I know firsthand the importance of nice teeth. I’m one of those people who skips on the way to the dentist and spends hours in the mouthwash aisles, so isn’t it natural to expect my man to do the same? Maybe his teeth aren’t perfectly straight, that’s fine. But please, please brush your teeth. Bad breath or oral hygiene isn’t usually something you notice immediately, but when you do … Oh, it’s a deal breaker.

2. Immaturity
As I highlighted in my last blog, there is no bigger turn off than a guy you’re afraid to take out in public. If I’m worried he’s going to make some sort of public disturbance or embarrass me in hopes of being cute and playful, I’m not going to have a good time. Sometimes we try to laugh these off on our dates and chalk them up to being rare instances, but for me, the more they happen, the more I’m planning my escape.

3. For lack of a better word, stupidity
I’m a woman who appreciates men who are intelligent. I’m talking someone who’s witty, cultured or can at least laugh at himself once in a while. I have always been someone who picks brains over brawn — ask my mom, she never fails to point that out. So guys who are unable to hold a conversation, or when they do, it’s always about themselves, are just not my cup of tea. I love teasing my guy and if I’m forced to stop and either repeat my statements or “dumb it down,” it just ruins the chemistry.

Keenan
With the absence of Josh Mansour, I’ve been asked to fill in. As the second most eligible bachelor in the office, behind Josh of course, I was a natural replacement.

For my inaugural post we’re discussing a pretty important piece to the puzzle of a successful relationship. First off, it’s important to note that I’m probably one of the pickiest dudes out there. I’m not looking for a princess and I don’t have a dream girl in my head, but my list of deal breakers is longer than a thanksgiving grocery list.

It also is important to note that when you’re looking at a relationship, there are going to be plenty of things that might bother you about your woman, but you have to decide what is simply too much to put up with.

My choices are three pretty ambiguous ideas, however, they’re probably my first and most important three.

1. Be engaging, be an individual
This one’s easy. Do you remember in high school on the first day of school when you’d go around the room and your teacher would ask you to say your name, your year and something you like to do? If you were that girl who said “hanging out with friends,” we’re already over.

I love a woman who can expand my ideals. Having simple, predictable interests or hobbies is a killer.

One of the coolest parts of a relationship is being able to learn from someone and try new things. If you don’t have interests or passion for something, what am I going to learn from you? How can you expand who I am?

Similarly, individuality is an expression of confidence. If a girl can’t be exactly who she wants to be one hundred percent of the time, then who is she? I don’t want to spend half our time together stroking a nonexistent ego, I’d rather embrace your personality for all that it is and learn from it.

The fact of the matter is, if you’re a simple person who can’t engage me, show me new things or be your own person, we have no business being together.

2. Don’t show up if you’re not going to put yourself together
Every time I’m picking you up for a night out I’m going to be clean-shaven, my hair will be on point and I’ll be dressed clean head to toe. I expect the same.

Throughout the course of a relationship there will be relaxed nights on the couch with a blanket and sweats, but if we’re headed out somewhere for a night on the town or whatever it may be, put yourself together.

It’s a sign of mutual respect when you can put on makeup, put on a fresh outfit and your hygiene is in order. If I care about you, I simply want everyone to see what I see in you. I will always give you my best, and all I want is yours in return.

3. Sense of humor
This actually might be the most important deal breaker. One of the best moments in a relationship is being able to share a laugh. We may come from two different places and backgrounds, but it’s imperative that we can smile and enjoy a laugh out of something similar.

Going hand in hand with this concept is each party needs to be able to put a smile on the other’s face. If you can’t make me laugh, we’re going to have an extremely dry, business-oriented relationship. Though essentially the ultimate goal of any relationship is a daily routine and reproduction of other humans, I want to be entertained in the interim.

An instant killer to this concept is a combination of bad stories and bad jokes. If you’re going to ramble on for the punch line or try to tell me a story with no climax, don’t even open your mouth.
A relationship should make you smile on bad days and highlight the best moments with a big smile or a hearty laugh. Without that, you’re just a complacent, mildly interesting friend at best and that is no place to be when aiming for a budding relationship.

Since I’m doing this blog solo, I have a little bit more leeway in topic choice. Now, we can talk about everything Josh hates. So, what should we talk about today? Makeup? Clothes? Shoes?
No, I’ve got it — let’s talk about men.

Lately, an issue I keep running into is determining the difference between boys and men.

When you’re in college, you meet a lot of people. When you meet a lot of people, chances are you’ll be going on quite a few dates.
One of the most important things to gauge when you’re on a date is whether you’re dealing with a boy or a man, and which one you’re more keen on being with in the long run.

Of course there are several internal factors that make up a good man, such as confidence, selflessness, courage and courtesy, but I’m talking about the social factors that will determine whether or not you’re embarrassed to take your guy out in public.

Some girls like the super boyishly playful type. These guys prefer watching “Finding Nemo” over “Schindler’s List”, enjoy the messiest coney dogs at What Up Dawg? and would much rather be playing broomball at Munn Ice Arena than studying for an exam the next day.

On the other hand, there are the more serious types that often remind us of our fathers. These men enjoy talking about the latest news in USA Today and often are found in the audience at classical concerts by the College of Music.

Now as a woman, it’s important to think about what you want. What fits your interests best? If you have someone playful, it’s important to make sure he can tone it down around your parents. If you want someone serious, it’s important to be able to get him to liven up on the weekends.

For me, I enjoy the perfect mix. Any guy that can keep up with my news lingo, but won’t make fun of me for ordering chicken fingers wherever we go out to eat is a keeper in my book.
Either way, it’s an important decision you’ve got to make yourself.
What are you looking for?

Our generation has undoubtedly picked up a lingo of our own — texting.

A quick push of a button or swipe of a finger can mean the beginning of a relationship, or the end.

But is texting a way to show how much you care or simply an efficient means of communication?

Kellie
Texting lingo is important to grasp at a very young age.

It’s crucial to not only comprehend what you’re reading, but to be able to write something of merit back.

Heres’s some quick rules: don’t overtext someone, don’t undertext someone (I’m guilty of that) and witty one-liners are never unappreciated.

When it comes to texting, in terms of relationships, the easiest signs that someone is interested you is the infamous over-smiley usage. For example, “Hey. :) What are you up to? :)” Whether you are a girl or a guy, this is probably the most obvious sign someone has a thing for you.

But then, there are less obvious signals. If you forget to text him back, and he texts you again, that’s a good sign, such as if he sends “good night” texts before bed or texts you “good morning.”

The important part about texting is being sure not to abuse the convenience factor.

Yes, it’s easier to text a girl and say, “Hey, we should hang out sometime.”

Personally, we don’t want to be asked out via text, and the little courage you boys can muster up to give us a call and properly ask us out goes such a long way.

Josh
I — like most sensible guys — am not very interested in texting.

Sure, it’s more efficient than having a 15-minute conversation about why someone’s running late or to remind a friend to bring something to a party, but too often something of emotional significance is trying to be taken from an incomplete sentence.

Texts are a means to an end, not a relationship barometer.

You shouldn’t be questioning your boyfriend’s loyalty because he neglected to include a smiley face at the end of his text.

Let’s be honest, a smiley face is just a colon and a closed parentheses.

It’s not romance, it’s incorrect grammar.

I hate to be a stick in the mud, but there needs to be a reality check.

There shouldn’t be text conversations. If you want to communicate more than one thought, just push a few different buttons and use the phone for it’s original purpose — to talk.

If you want romance, look in the person’s eyes, not the screen of your phone.

And if you want to show someone you care, make more of an effort than typing “hi” into your phone.

It’s really not that hard. It’s what people used to call communication.

First dates are a tricky endeavor.

From the hours of preparation and worrying beforehand, to the anxious first moments and the night’s final nerve-racking minutes, the first date is a blind foray into the unknown of pure romance or excruciating awkwardness.

So, what is the standard procedure for the days following the critical first date?

Josh
It doesn’t take long to tell whether a first date is a hit or a miss.

Usually before the main course hits the table, you can sense if this is the type of person you’d like to see again, or will look to avoid at nearly all costs.

If the first date goes poorly, a lot of times both people can tell, but when there’s an interest that isn’t reciprocated, I try to be as honest as possible.

Once I get a text that reads “Had a great time last night,” I would respond with “I had a great time too, but I don’t think this is a real fit.”

It’s certainly not what someone wants to hear, but it’s up front, honest and kind, and is the type of response I hope someone would give me.

But figuring out the first steps to take after a positive first date can be much more difficult, because when you don’t like someone, the possibilities of a potential relationship are known to be nonexistent.

But a positive first date produces the potential for a variety of unknown outcomes, which can be daunting.

In most cases, it’s important to try to read the other person’s reactions and get a sense if the feeling is mutual.

If they’re laughing at your jokes, playfully touching you on the arm or shoulder and seem generally at ease throughout the evening, it’s likely a safe bet that there’s a connection.

In that case, you should feel comfortable taking the first step to secure a second date.

If it’s more difficult to get a read of the situation, it’s important to play it slow, maybe with a simple and fairly innocuous text, to help gather more information.

The important thing is to proceed with caution. It’s a jungle out there and the caterpillar you think will become a butterfly, might just be a worm.

Kellie
Seriously, Josh?

You would really flat out tell a girl, “I don’t think this is a real fit?”

In my opinion, that isn’t necessary at all.

After a first date that you didn’t quite enjoy, there is no need to have that super serious, “I don’t think I like you” statement at all.

First of all, you’re assuming they had a great time and are totally into you. Chances are, she probably didn’t have a great time either if you had that unamused “This isn’t fun at all” look on your face during the date.

Assuming your date was super into you when she wasn’t could result in a girl picking up her phone and laughing at your “I don’t think is a real fit,” passing it around to all her friends, who all laugh as well.

Guys have the ability to be understanding after rejection, because that’s what makes them gentlemen. Girls, however, are much less willing to be nice.

If I went out and considered my date a dud, I wouldn’t do anything about it. It’s just not necessary.

Once I get a text that reads “Had a great time last night,” I would respond with “Yeah, me too! See you around campus!”

Simple, yet effective. If you’re really worried your ex-date won’t get the hint, go ahead and drop the “pal” card.

But if you do turn out to be swooned by your dater, there is no error in assuming all guys enjoy a chase. So girls, if he calls asking for another date, try not picking up the first time, or not replying to his text immediately. Go ahead and take your time responding. Let him sweat a bit, and chatter about it with his pack of bros — because you know they’re secretly as giggly as us when we’re not around — before you give him the green light.

Walking down the street, someone walks by and makes you take a second look.
Glancing back, there’s something about the person that creates an attraction, but what?
What’s the first physical feature we notice in the opposite sex?

Kellie
Smile. I can’t be any more direct about that. The first thing I notice is a guy’s smile. Through talking with friends, I have found this is common favored trait among those who have suffered from braces.

After dealing with the torment of having a face full of metal, many former victims of the orthodontist’s chair of terror tend to notice the pearly whites of a potential significant other.

You can tell so much by someone’s smile, such as whether a guy is relaxed or nervous, whether he’s confident or shy and whether or not oral hygiene is a priority.

And with a smile, comes a laugh. Every girl knows a guy who can take a joke is more than a keeper.

I also want to take this opportunity to point out that most guys say the first physical feature they notice in a girl is her eyes. I’m going to be that girl to say: Yeah, right.

You definitely size up our body masses, our choice of clothing or lack thereof and take notice of whether or not there are any obnoxious facial features before you even get anywhere close to looking at our eyes.

So, stop it.

Once you do talk to us and finally look us in the eyes, you can call them pretty if you’d like to (are eyes ever not attractive?) But before that moment, don’t say it’s the first thing you notice.

Josh
I hate agreeing with Kellie about anything. Seriously, it makes me violently ill, but on this occasion she happens to have one thing right.

A girl’s smile is the first thing I notice, because it offers a window into a girl’s personality.

For example, if a girl spends the entire night with a bored, standoffish look on her face, she doesn’t look intriguing, but rather narcissistic and constipated.

Not a good look.

But if a girl has a smile that lights up a room, it makes me want to see if I can make it happen.

It’s a challenge, and once you’ve accomplished it, you just want to duplicate it.

There’s something about being able to produce that reaction within someone else that often feels better than the actual emotion itself.

So, while I’m not immune to the stereotypical trappings of womanhood, the reality is looks are fleeting.

Ultimately everyone’s bodies will fade, but a smile lasts forever.

One of the hardest parts of the breakup is the returning of assets.
You and your ex search your homes for items to begrudgingly return to each other in an effort to remove yourself from his or her past.

And while digging through drawers to find your ex’s belongings, there’s one thing you won’t find that the two of you are likely to argue about: who gets the friends in the breakup?

Josh
There’s a strange thing that happens when you become friends with someone — you claim ownership of the person.

When you introduce him or her to someone, you say “I’d like you to meet MY friend,” not “a friend,” and when “a friend” is used, it’s usually in the phrase “I’d like you to meet a friend of mine.”
Consciously or unconsciously, we feel the need to stake claim to our friends when introducing them to someone, and this extends to introductions to a significant other.

It’s almost as if the introduction serves as a way of sharing your friend with him or her, and it’s being done with the understanding that you’re sharing, not giving.

So when the moment comes that you break up with your significant other, it should be understood that you would like your friend returned to you, and that request should be honored.

Unless the breakup ends remarkably smoothly, it’s too awkward for the person to be engaged in friendships with both of you.
Instead of forcing the person in the middle to make an uncomfortable decision, there’s a simple, unspoken rule that should be followed.

Return your friends to their rightful owners.

Kellie
From a woman’s perspective, there is one major factor of social etiquette that holds precedent in this argument — the girl code.

When I break up with a boyfriend, I think it’s reasonable to expect my girlfriends to follow suit. They might have liked my boyfriend plenty, but the only reason they know him is through me, and I expect them to be on my side after the breakup. Besides a quick nod to be polite when passing on the street, my friends should not try to continue a friendship with my ex.

That is common girl law, and that’s what real friends do.
I actually ran into a problem with this earlier this year. My ex was so angry with me for ending the relationship, he made sure to schedule a nice lunch date with my roommates the next day. During the meal, he decided to get his revenge by telling them I thought they were stupid, annoying and worst of all — fat.

There are so many things wrong with that situation — not only his vengeance, but also their acceptance to that lunch date.

That’s why girl code was invented, ladies — learn it and live it.
To avoid the conflict I encountered earlier this year, it’s important to understand who gets who in a breakup. Should my ex have targeted my friends like that? No, he should have left them alone. And when his friend, who I had grown to know and love throughout the relationship, avoided eye contact with me in the cafeteria a few weeks later, although disheartened, I applauded him for doing the right thing.

If you continue a friendship with a friend’s ex, that could lead to something more, and that’s a whole new can of worms I’m hoping you’re too smart to open.

However, if you and an ex share a mutual friend, it’s acceptable to share the friend, as long as you’re not super public and annoying about it.

For instance, if I had a guy friend that my ex was friends with as well, I would not be posting obnoxious inside jokes all over his Facebook such as, “Remember that guy who came up to me and asked me out yesterday? That was so funny. And remember what he said? I’ll never forget that, bubble buddies for life!”

Annoying. You can share a friend, just be mature about it.
Otherwise, if they were his friends first, don’t break the code and just let them go. They’re his friends, and after making the mistake of losing you, he needs something to hold on to.

Valentine’s Day is here. Is it a day of love and romance, or a Hallmark holiday for card companies who want to make a quick buck?

Josh
The problem with Valentine’s Day is the sense of obligation the holiday creates.

For single people, it’s the feeling that you’re a loser if you don’t have a date on Feb. 14, even if you have one all other 365 days of the year.

For people in committed relationships, it’s the pressure to meet your significant other’s gift expectations.

And for married couples, it’s the obligation to drag yourself off the couch and do something on a normally meaningless Tuesday night.
We feel these obligations because that’s what Hallmark has incessantly beaten into our brains as being important from the moment they realized people were gullible enough to buy into it.

Now I’m not going to lie — getting chocolate is always awesome. But the people that cry about being alone or groan about going out to dinner are simply acting like sheep following a ritual that’s not based in a remote amount of substance.

But hey, we’re in a recession, so we might as well buy up a ton of junk we don’t need and would never otherwise purchase.
It beats the heck out of having to be spontaneous.

Kellie
Josh is always the cynic!
Although Valentine’s Day can have it’s downfalls, there is nothing wrong with a holiday celebrating the color pink.

Sure, we shouldn’t have to wait until one specific day to show our significant other we care, but there’s still no reason not to celebrate.

But where Josh is really wrong is it doesn’t have to be all about the money.

Last year I spent hours upon hours fighting with the hot glue gun to make a giant Valentine for my Valentine — using every bow, every sticker and every bit of glitter and sequins I owned, and he loved it. And why? Because I spent time I could’ve been working on homework, getting ahead in my work duties — or most importantly, sleeping ­— to work on something that came directly from both my hands and my heart.

Love doesn’t always come from the wallet. Valentine’s Day is about uniting the country in celebrating the one thing we all know how to do — love.

So, like I said in one of the very first articles I wrote for The State News, get out there and tell someone you love them — everyone deserves to hear it at least once a year.